Archive for May, 2012


First off, what the fuck? Who the hell names their first single off of themselves? How unmemorable are you trying make yourself? Are you just trying to make yourself a one hit wonder? I know rappers like Nas have songs like Nas is like… but, their not the fucking same. That was a clever play on words full of interesting metaphors. This piece of hot garbage is just a random assortment of drug references. Poorly made ones at that.

I usually would give a mini biography on the artist at this point, but after this single I doubt anyone will give two shits who this guy is.

What a douche bag!

Okay  before I rip this song a new one, I want you to look up this song on youtube. Just listen to it for a couple of seconds. Can you understand anything this twat is saying? It sounds like he has two tongues in his mouth that are both fighting to be the dominant tongue. Trust me when I say, you aren’t missing out on anything. Let’s start digging through this pile of shit…..(Bring some gloves)

Cool
36 o’s so’I’m ridin’ ’round with that nina,
Ridin’ with a hoe named Kesha, smokin’ on Kesha…
My diamonds talk for me they say hi can I met you?
She fly high, high in the sky, hoe I can’t see you
Got a condo on my wrist girl, I’m cashing out
Got a condo around my neck girl, I’m cashing out
36 o’s so’I’m ridin round with that nina
My diamonds talk for me they say hey can I meet ya?

Okay, why the hell are we starting with the word, Cool? What the hell are you conforming? Nina, according to my friend, is a reference to a gun and Kesha is a type of marijuana. Not sure why he couldn’t just say, “i’m riding with a nine millimeter and have a lot of weed on me.” Then he “creatively'” refers to a prostitute named Kesha. Did you catch that? He has one the most uncreative uses of personification in a song as well. So whats really confusing is, what the fuck does Cashing out refer to? As in he’s cashing out his money for something new? Is he talking about a fucking debt card?

I got versace all on my back, these hoes all on my back
Plus these plugs all on my back, cause they know I’m moving that pack
These Louies all in my face, 4/5 feel stay up on my waist
Plus it ain’t on me for nothin so please don’t make me catch a case
Cause bitch I’m bout it, me walking round with no check on me,
Psss, yeah I doubt it
Your girl ain’t finna leave with me, pss, yeah I doubt it
And I’m like, what the hell they talkin’ bout?
And if I got it I bought it, cause boy you know I’m cashing out, cool

Okay why are hookers on your back? Is this some sort of strange sex act i’m unaware of? What the fuck are Louies? Like Louis Vuitton? But, if Louies be “all in his face” why doesn’t he carry a “check” around if he’s so rich? We also have modern rap stereotype #2 aka the “Mr. Steal your girl” effect. Why in modern rap music is stealing someone’s girlfriend an admirable quality, instead of making them look like an asshole? Also, I like how he ask, “What the hell they talkin’ bout?” as if we can understand what the hell he is trying to say.

Ok, I drop the top, hop in
Hoes they coming by flocks in
Birds they coming by flocks in
Pass them birds like stockton
Play with my money I’m poppin
No acting, but it’s a movie
Got Spinz on da beat so we ain’t loosing
Don’t act like yo hoe ain’t choosin
I’m blowed up, yeah I’m da bomb
Ridin roun blowin on stank bombs
Pussy so good you should thank moms
Top flo’ suite chillin at the palms
We want the whole loaf leave ya’ll the crumbs
Til then I’m runnin my check up
And it’s fuck a bugatti I’m callin my jet up

I just have to say this, did this guy just rhyme in with fucking in? Not only that but he just changed the words from “hoes” to “birds” and kept the sentence the same. That is beyond fucking lazy that’s just….ugh!!!

There is another verse but, it’s the same shit. This song is horrendous! It’s horribly produced with it’s half assed techno beat, the writing is full of bad metaphors, slang that makes no sense and poor grammar. I feel stupid having just heard this song.

Thanks for reading.

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Jesus and the Unicorns

Please just make the fire higher
I’m not asking for much
Just a little more taste of desire
A burning of torch
Watch me walk this world
With you by my side
I can see the rainbow girls
Waiting at the great divide

Pour the water into
This sleeping room
I think it’s time to flood
Maybe we can flood
This place

“Please don’t cry anymore”, I say
I’m already so torn
While Jesus and his purple unicorns
Prick needles in their skin
I think they think that the hole stop them from drowning
In the water
Oh to be like Jesus
But we already have our own holes

Watch the rain come down
And the floor level rise up
I think it’s time to flood
I think it’s time to flood

Oh, Noah
Please bring us a big cardboard boat
So we can float away
Noah pretty baby
I know this isn’t the way
We said it would be
While bring three of every animal
Just to be safe
Where Jesus and his purple unicorns?
Never mind, I don’t think they can be saved

In this flood
In this flood

 

In this very ancient room
I can hear the whisper
of the ghost as they do
Their best to scream out loud
But I pay them no mind
And as I watch the clocks count time
I look up at the Russian windows
And I see something so brand new
But somehow so familiar
It’s you but it’s different
There are darker undertones hidden
Behind that angelic disguise
I now can see a monster lie

Hey, sea bear
You may have tricked my heart today
But eyes can now see it in the right way
(Please take this)
Binding off and branding right now
Because somehow, because somehow
You’re shadows shining through

And as the sun leaps
Bounds over the moon
The sky is turning an odd shade gray
And as you smile I can see your fangs
And the “US” starting to decay
So jump back into the ocean
From where you came
And swim to another’s pond
Because I felt I caught the greatest one
But I guess I was all wrong

Hey jumping fish
You may have tricked my heart today
But eyes can now see it in the right way
(Please take this)
Binding off and branding right now
Because somehow, because somehow
You’re shadows shining through

Weeping willows and silly girls
Always fall for the worst ones
And never try to get up
But I’m neither, not anymore
I’m using a knife to
Cut through every stone door

Hey sea bear
You may have tricked my heart today
But eyes can now see it in the right way
(Please take this)
Binding off and branding right now
Because somehow, because somehow
You’re shadows shining through
And it’s more you then I ever knew

I don’t understand how he thinks
He’s a king
When all his treasures have been lost
So he has nothing to bring
When he’s called for court
But he still things he’s King

I don’t understand this man
And how he can take me into the
Palm of his hand
And melt me down
When his golden crown
Has cracked on the palace floor
With every ivory jewel
Lost behind the bedroom door
But he seems to have a magic
Over every part of me
He uses tender fingers to
Break me into a small piece

With all this power over me
It’s no wonder that he thinks he’s King

Yet I still cannot see how
He can think he’s a King
When he owns less and less each day
But he moves me in every way
And he thinks he’s a king
And he thinks he’s a king
And he thinks he’s a king

I can swear I do not see
What he sees when looks in his
Empty house
He says
“it’s a paradise and palace walls with
Satin curtains and rugs of silk”
While he buries me down
Under the very floor boards
And then picks up right out
Raps in lace and love
Then I fall down while
Losing all control

With the grace he has with words
It’s no wonder that he’s never heard
That he’s really no King

Yet I still cannot see how
He can think he’s a King
When he owns less and less each day
But he moves me in every way
And he thinks he’s a king
And he thinks he’s a king
And he thinks he’s a king

Bring in the knight
And cut these binds
He has over me
I cannot take it all in stride
Anymore
My poker face has now been worn
But he’ll use the wind to call be back
And I know he’ll have anything he thinks

Because he thinks he is a King

 

 

Honey bee in this flower bed
You picked me out every one you saw
So pretty they all where but you still choose
To get nectar from me
Then one day a rose grew in my place
I thought you would never stray
But once again, I prove how wrong I always am
Then we divided our things in to two
And broke every bond that we knew

Now that it’s over
You got the rest of it
You got the rest of it
But all that doesn’t matter because
I got the best of it
I got the best of it

I know she probably taste sweeter than me
And I know she pays care to all your buzzing
But one day all her red will fade
And her roots will die
All of her honey will dry
While her stem withers brown
Then we’ll see who will be the one who cries
Because I’ll be standing tall and strong
While you slowly fly away
to your honeycomb

It’s appears you’ve got more than me
Because you’ve got the rest of it
You own the rest of it
But my little is so much better
‘cause I got the best of it

The balled of the Raisin Girl

Down by fifth and nine avenue
There was this raisin girl that I knew
No one ever said word
To the raisin girl

She was born from a golden vine
With bronze leaves
The ripest of grapes
She was strong but she couldn’t see
Father time checking her out
Waiting to take away his gift

What happened ever to the Raisin girl?
She used to come around the park
And talk about the birds
She’d just walk across the grass
No one ever asked
About her

Then her smooth green skin
Started to wrinkle
And turned to an odd shade of purple
All her beauty started to fade
She would call up the cornflake boys
And cinnamon men
Chasing them down with
Sticky hands
Hoping to catch one of her own
Just have someone to call on
But ever since she changed
All the pink things
Have frayed away

What happened ever to the Raisin girl?
She used to come around the park
And talk about the birds
She’d just walk across the grass
No one ever asked
About her

She so went to the store
And I saw her buy the milk
I don’t watch her walk home
But I swear that later that night
I heard her say,
“I can breathe again”
She said,
“I can take this world within”
Then I watched 72 spoons bend

What happened ever to the Raisin girl?
She used to come around the park
And talk about the birds
She’d just walk across the grass
No one ever asked
About her